The Inner Compass
The Inner Compass
We sometimes fear trusting ourselves because of past decisions made that have gone awry, things we may have taken a leap of faith on but did not pan out the way we invented in our mind. Sometimes our ideals and grand plans turn sour because of a failed attempt to capture an opportunity.
That fear and mistrust has left me kicking myself many times over: from furniture buys, to commuter routes, to the people I've let in my life. So to avoid any missed opportunities, and bruises, I've established a system of trust within myself; I've learned to listen and accept the truth as it is presented.
Having faith in my inner compass has allowed me to build an inner alert system that chimes in when there is a particular thing, person, or situation that I should pay special attention to. The ability to discern and make decisions based on an intuitive feeling is something that I have had to develop through trust and faith in myself: It is not as easy as it sounds or looks, but I promise the journey is worth it.
Like many I have had many bouts with myself where I would deny, fight, or just plain ignore the truth that stood right in front of me. I would try to stifle the guidance that spoke from within, which sometimes nagged me to moving forward with a decision. Out of habit, I would ignore it. Only to wish I had listened or built enough of a relationship with myself to where I could trust and pull from that wisdom. Especially when I found myself in a rut; it would have saved a lot of time.
Here are some steps to becoming clear when making decisions:
- Be still and ask yourself “Do I want to know this, and why is it important?”
- Check in to see how you are feeling in response to your question. If you find any resistance, pay attention to that.
- Be aware of your resistance, accept it, and then release it.
- Check in again, but this time with a willingness to receive the truth: even if it's not what you want to hear.
- Receive your answer and decide if you want to accept it.
The last tip is important because it helps you to not feel like a victim to your choices. All to often, we easily shame ourselves for not trusting a "hunch", but this method consciously puts you in the drivers seat of the decision making process. With full awareness, you can freely move forward knowing that you heard your inner guidance, but chose not to listen. This way, your habit isn't something that just happens to you.
It is important for us to see where we have the power in the outcome. it will not only help you to accept ownership, but it consciously puts you in charge of the actions you take. Going forward, you will feel more comfortable listening to your inner guidance, and making decisions based on the foundation of trust you have built within yourself.
Naturally, there will be moments of indecision throughout this transition. You will be faced with yourself in new ways that you may perceive as frustrating and/or annoying. Try not to dismiss these feelings; it will give insight as to how you choose to handle yourself, and the habitual reactions towards accepting your truth.
- Do you handle yourself in a way that is not supportive?
- Do you react in a way that denounces your truth in the same manner that someone has once done to you?
- What is your tolerance level with yourself? You may find that you have a short threshold.
Try and view this as a new layer of the relationship with yourself, after all, you are with you, 24/7.
Our truths can sometimes feel like a curse instead of a blessing. I've found that is the case when we are resistant to it right along with change. And although we all have ideas of what feels right and what makes the most sense to us, most of stems from a desire for convenience and simplicity, which isn't always the best route.
Building a responsible relationship and trusting your inner compass will help guide you through the journey of life. Whether it is a question of, should I invest in this startup? should I marry this guy? is it better to take the subway or bus? do I go off road from my original plan? or do I want to be a father? ... It is an ability that is worth developing, and a relationship with yourself that is worth having.
All Rights Reserved, Copyright © 2014 Challenge The Self
i wrote this piece as I was reflecting on a time in my life where I habitually doubted myself and my inner guidance. Without fail, I always found myself wishing I had just listened. Daily, I noticed that my inner voice was becoming more accurate than I was giving it credit for. With time I realized that the doubt I felt for myself stemmed from past disappointments and failures: things I was holding against myself. All of the times I took a chance and it didn't work out the way I wanted.
I understood that I needed to rebuild trust from within, and not allow mistakes to color my personal relationship and experiences going forward. I got tired of kicking myself in the ass, saying, "you should have trust your gut". It motivated me to start listening to myself. During that time I decided, No More will I doubt myself. So I chose to rebuild and establish the trust that I was missing.